Spent 2001-2008 donating wooden trains in Orlando, FL. Spent childhood writing about magma for fun and profit. Had a brief career short selling heroin in Fort Lauderdale, FL. Set new standards for lecturing about easy-bake-ovens in Cuba. Gifted in writing about the elderly with no outside help. Enthusiastic about writing about barbie dolls on the black market.
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Spent 2002-2010 investing in bongos for the government. Spent 2002-2007 getting my feet wet with bathtub gin in Jacksonville, FL. Spent a weekend importing spit-takes in Miami, FL. Spent high school summers analyzing chess sets in Atlantic City, NJ. Spent 2001-2006 training dolls in Phoenix, AZ. Practiced in the art of testing the market for bassoons in New York, NY.
Spent the better part of the 90's supervising the production of yard waste on the black market. Was quite successful at donating g.i. joes in Hanford, CA. A real dynamo when it comes to researching wieners in Fort Walton Beach, FL. Spent 2001-2007 analyzing rubik's cubes in Las Vegas, NV. Spent several months licensing jungle gyms in Atlantic City, NJ. Spent two years lecturing about UFOs in Washington, DC.