- Imagine now that you put on a football shirt with his name written on it and you go to play with your friends in a football match. Imagine that you have a chance to score and you miss. Imagine that you get a second chance and you miss again, but this time, everyone in your team begins to shout at you. What effect does that have on your confidence? Even at the highest levels of football, we see situations where experienced footballers do not have the confidence to take a shot at the goal. For some reason, their confidence has been damaged and they are happy to do all the running and tackling, but will not pull the trigger to have a shot; they give the ball to another player. Why does this happen? The reason is because too many people have told them how useless they are at scoring, that they believe it. One of the best tests of confidence in football is when players are needed to step up and take a penalty in a knock out competition. The pain associated with missing a penalty and having millions of fans hating you, is too much for a weak mind. The players who are confident enough to take the risk, deserve total respect. As a performer, it is no different.
- To go from being a pupil in a convent to one of the most public celebrities on the planet, required a supreme level of confidence. In a fiercely competitive business environment, your confidence will also be stress tested.
- So how did successful people develop confidence? The answer, is by learning from their mistakes and aggressively seeking to prove that they are the best. Trial and perfection, not trial and error.
Throughout your day to day life, your confidence will be tested by many different situations. Some of these will be very difficult to deal with and you may become emotional and withdrawn. When this happens to me, I go into my cave and rewind the whole experience to start looking at how I could have acted differently. Eventually you realise that there are things which you control and some things which are beyond your control. It is best to stop worrying too much about the things which are beyond your control. When I come out of the cave, there is a sense of calm and a feeling that new software has been written in my head to deal with any similar situations. Family and friends can be very supportive, but they can also be the perpetrators who say the most annoying things when you really want to hear a positive mental attitude. For that reason, I have stopped bouncing too many ideas off them and now seek professional opinions, even at a cost. This is more useful and productive, but more importantly, it gives a confidence boost.
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