- There has been a lot of talking about good parenting practices but many people do not pay attention to relationship between the parents while discussing parenting. Both of the parents need to pay attention to their children to raise them to be good. It is one side of the coin. The other side is about relationship between the parents. There can be conflicts between both of the parents and these conflicts can be witnessed by the kids. These conflicts can affect the children psychologically and neurologically. According to a study, the stress hormones in children are released in the bigger amount when children hear the sounds of yelling from their adults.
- The research further states that sound of fighting by the parents can scare the children so much that they start thinking of the world as a scary place to live in. As a result, they develop sleep disorders. Furthermore, they fear the sounds of yelling from adult people, and they also start stuffing their fear which pops up any other time in form of anxiety and anger.
- The most dangerous impression that children get from the sounds of yelling by adults is that they start to think verbal fighting as the only way to deal with the problems and conflicts.
- Although the spousal conflicts cannot be avoided when there is a difference of opinion and the conflict may occur in front of the children, making up for the conflict later can be very helpful. Below discussed are the scenarios which can help in modeling the children in better way.
Making amends after the fight
- One of the parents may raise the voice and actually snap the other. However, if he/she apologizes immediately, it would be something great to learn for the children. From this, the children can actually learn about making amends after the fight.
Resolving difference of opinion peacefully
- The difference of opinion is the general scenario among spouses. But if the spouses work this difference out without raising the voice, the children will learn about resolving the matters in a cool-minded state. The children would learn that humans can make mistakes, but the real way of solving them is to work them out peacefully rather than yelling.
Postponing a conflict
- It can be a great act of responsibility to respect the presence of kids before starting the conflict which had brewed up in the previous hours. Both the parents can agree on postponing the conflict for some other time in order to get calmed down and, more importantly, find a place where children would hear the discussion over difference of opinion.
Things that you can try
- You can try to be respectful to your spouse in front of your kids. The major benefit of doing so is that it will not only provide your child great role models to follow but you will also feel your relationship with your spouse getting refreshed.