The Darkness were so fucking cool...

@JohnnyGhosts LIES. They did bridge club every Wednesday, ffs.

@JohnnyGhosts and bloody NEEDLEWORK on Thursdays.

@TRJeffries get your hands off of my woman mother fucker.

@JohnnyGhosts sorry- just can't explain all the feelings she's making me feel. my heart's in overdrive, and she's behind the steering wheel.

@TRJeffries you need to stop sticking that fucking shit in to your arms *falsetto voice*

@JohnnyGhosts maybe. my one true concern, though, is that we never let the bells end.

@TRJeffries your so tall Tim it's like you're in John o groats and I'm down in lands end.

@JohnnyGhosts no, I was there but then I bought a one-way ticket to hell and back. now I have absolutely no idea where i'm going.

@TRJeffries seemed like a good idea at the time. Such a very very good idea at the time.

@JohnnyGhosts it really did. but now I'm being punished for all my offences, and i've only got myself to blame.

@TRJeffries don't worry. Love is only a feeling.

@JohnnyGhosts good. cause right now i'm close to giving up, giving up, giving a, well, anyway.

@TRJeffries don't worry mate. Just put your arms around me. Your dinner lady arms.

@JohnnyGhosts okay. now let's walk down to that english country garden i saw earlier

@TRJeffries just make sure you don't get stuck in a rut...for eternity.

@JohnnyGhosts yeah, i'll be alright. i'm holding my own (give or take a tear or two)

@TRJeffries *guitar solo*

@JohnnyGhosts *incomprehensible high-pitched wail*

@TRJeffries and dismount.

@JohnnyGhosts good. now i can go to the shops and buy some loo roll.