<![CDATA[El Snarkistani · Storify]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistaniNodeJS RSS ModuleFri, 24 May 2013 13:01:01 GMT<![CDATA[Logic Fail: Islamists Get Their South of the Border On ]]>

Wherein Louie Gohmert makes less sense than usual.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Thu, Apr 18 2013 06:49:33

So this happened...
GOP Rep: Radical Islamists Being Trained To 'Act Like Hispanic'GOP Rep: Radical Islamists Being Trained To 'Act Like Hispanic'
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) warned Wednesday that "radical Islamists" are being "trained to act like Hispanic[s]" and cross the U.S.-Mex...
And that, naturally, prompted a response: 
And a call to action: 
Which may have prompted some tweeting. 
There were language concerns: 
Some general observations as to the stellar logic of Rep. Gohmert: 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/when-hashtags-go-wrong-islamistshttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/when-hashtags-go-wrong-islamistsThu, 18 Apr 2013 13:49:33 GMT<![CDATA[A Prison So Great, Taliban Want It For Themselves]]>

"Model" prison in Helmand currrently under siege.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Wed, Mar 06 2013 04:17:11

So this caught the eye this morning:
I know, I'm a day behind. Reason why this piqued the interest is because of tweets like this:
Which is good...now they can give the Afghan policia some OJT on how to deal with a prison riot.
Taliban prisoners seize control of British-funded prison in Helmand - TelegraphTaliban prisoners seize control of British-funded prison in Helmand - Telegraph
Afghan police and soldiers have been surrounding Helmand central prison for more than two days, after a weekend protest in a wing housing...
Apparently, all is not well:

The violence began on Sunday morning when prisoners held in a wing reserved for captured insurgents began protesting at their lack of exercise. Local media reported inmates were also angry many prisoners had been able to gain their freedom through bribery or family connections. Other inmates soon joined the disturbances and at one point around 1,200 prisoners were involved, sources said.
All of which is kind of a bummer, since:
@ISAFmedia @UN team visited #Helmand’s model prison. Impressed by its successful approach to rehab. #Afghanistan http://pic.twitter.com/5fNky59R · HOM Catriona Laing
Probably had courses like, "How to Buy Your Way to Freedom," or, "Can't Buy Your Way Out? How to Prepare for the Inevitable Riot."
'Safer behind Afghan prison walls''Safer behind Afghan prison walls'
The BBC's David Loyn takes a look at how one prison in Afghanistan is taking a softer approach to punishment.
Softer...as in cash...which is comfy.
A different story from Helmand - the BBC investigates progress in civilian institution-building - Catriona LaingA different story from Helmand - the BBC investigates progress in civilian institution-building - Catriona Laing
To listen to some commentators, you might easily gain the impression that no progress has been or can made in Helmand, and as soon as Bri...
So a model prison in Helmand has a riot 'cuz folks be unhappy that they couldn't have bought their way out like the other prisoners. Most confusing progress ever.
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/a-prison-so-great-taliban-want-ithttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/a-prison-so-great-taliban-want-itWed, 06 Mar 2013 12:17:11 GMT<![CDATA[John Cook from Gawker Live Tweets a Politico Interview ]]>

...and it is magic.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Tue, Feb 19 2013 07:59:21

So John Cook, of @Gawker, decided to live tweet today. A 2008 interview with then-President George W. Bush.

His point? Well, read to the end. He sums it up nicely.

Brace yourselves for the hard hitting journalism you are about to witness.
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/john-cook-from-gawker-live-tweets-a-politico-interhttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/john-cook-from-gawker-live-tweets-a-politico-interTue, 19 Feb 2013 15:59:21 GMT<![CDATA[Social Media Lessons, with Scott Brown]]>

...or: "Why We Should All Put Our Phones Away on Friday Nights."

Storified by El Snarkistani · Fri, Jan 25 2013 23:33:59

I've been a fan of Scott Brown's for a while...we go way back.
Senator Brown and His Multi-Cam TeflonSenator Brown and His Multi-Cam Teflon
I promise, last post about Senator Scott Brown. At least that's the plan. I wrote about his recent trip to Afghanistan here, and, in what...
But I don't often pay much attention to his Twitter feed, since he  tends to tweet things like this. 
That was on the 21st. 

Now that he's in the private sector, though, he apparently feels free to get a little more personal. A little more vulnerable. Show us all what he's made of. 
That's his daughter. So that's good. Warm, good old American family values, supporting the kids.

Then things got...cryptic. 
And denizens of the interwebs were ready with their interpretations. 
Brown's responses, in wonderfully articulate diplomatese. 
That's when the initial piling on began. 
I would buy that shirt. 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/scott-brown-wins-the-internets-todayhttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/scott-brown-wins-the-internets-todaySat, 26 Jan 2013 07:33:59 GMT<![CDATA[QOTD: On UN torture]]>

Tales from the MOI

Storified by El Snarkistani · Mon, Jan 21 2013 03:24:59

So besides another attack in Kabul, there's this UN report. And this may be the quote of the year from the MOI on the subject. 
I have no idea what that means. Still awesome. 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/qotd-on-un-torturehttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/qotd-on-un-tortureMon, 21 Jan 2013 11:21:34 GMT<![CDATA[A Bombing in Kabul]]>

and why it's a problem

Storified by El Snarkistani · Wed, Jan 16 2013 01:40:46

So...this happened.
Which...turns out...was true. 
Police Say Suicide Bomber Strikes in Afghan CapitalPolice Say Suicide Bomber Strikes in Afghan Capital
KABUL, Afghanistan (AP) - A suicide car bomber struck at the gate of the Afghan intelligence service in the country's capital Wednesday, ...
Today's attack Picture by Mirwais Harooni · Facebook
#KabulBlast Afghan security officers inspect the site of suicide car bombing in #Kabul, #Afghanistan (by Afghan Eyes) http://pic.twitter.com/VMm6IzDD · Waslat Hasrat-Nazimi
And it could have been worse. 
But what's really troubling is this: 
These are common themes from ISAF in response to these attacks, and has been for a while now: that these are the signs of a desperate, dying insurgency. 

As I'm writing this, it's possible that more facts will come out about this bombing, but likely they won't shed any further light on the subject. What we do know is that the headquarters of National Directorate of Security (NDS) in Kabul was the target of what's referred to as a complex attack: it appears to have been well-coordinated, and despite apparently not achieving their full objectives, they managed to get at the NDS...again. This happened just last month. 
Afghan spy chief wounded in Kabul attackAfghan spy chief wounded in Kabul attack
Afghanistan's intelligence chief has been wounded in an assassination attempt in Kabul, the capital. Asadullah Khalid, who heads the Nati...
And in case you're under the assumption that this man is the bee's knees, give this a read:

Richard Colvin, a former Canadian deputy ambassador to Afghanistan who worked closely with Khalid, testified before the Canadian parliament in 2009 that Khalid was directly involved in torture. From the perspective of one neighbourhood in Herat Citing "very credible evidence", Colvin said as far back as the summer of 2006, Khalid was known "to have had a dungeon in Ghazni ... where he used to detain people for money ... He was known to be running a narcotics operation. He had a criminal gang. He had people killed who got in his way."

— aljazeera.com · Wed, Jan 16 2013 01:27:07
For those of you playing at home, the NDS is somewhat like the FBI, but with cheaper suits. And messier prisons. Human rights issues aside, the NDS is responsible for intelligence gathering and analysis. If their capacity to do that effectively is so diminished that the Taliban can execute attacks against its director and its headquarters without prior knowledge, it speaks volumes about the future facing this country. 

An insurgency capable of pulling off that kind of operation against the NDS doesn't need to beat us on the battlefield. To beat us in what should be the most secure city in Kabul, able to breach some of the most secure targets in the capital city, takes a level of planning, logistics, and execution of mission that should give us serious pause about the actual ability of Afghanistan's security forces to protect their own country. 

And a final note: sadly, this is all too true. 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/how-not-to-tweet-about-a-bombinghttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/how-not-to-tweet-about-a-bombingWed, 16 Jan 2013 09:40:46 GMT<![CDATA[Some Thoughts from the Masses on #PAOFail]]>

#PAOFail is getting some traction, and some good feedback.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Thu, Jun 21 2012 12:12:18

From Dan Lamothe, this post is tied to the story that prompted me to Storify...again. 
My post. 
Social Media Situational Awareness: #PAOFailSocial Media Situational Awareness: #PAOFail
Yes, it's now a hashtag. Expect it often.
As PAOs go, I suspect Mr. Haag was all right. He seems normal. 
Coming from him, this means a lot. No kidding, no snark. 
Dan responded again. 
It didn't surprise me either. 

That's part of my problem, that it's not surprising that a lieutenant colonel in the Marine Corps finds it useful to take time out of his day to counter wildly inaccurate messages from a non-Taliban account. 
I still stand by the story, and on this note, today Tyrell Mayfield posted this over at the Kabul Cable:

Effectively, @ISAFmedia amplified @ABalkhi’s message from an original audience of 5,000 users and ensured an additional 37,000 users were exposed to @ABalkhi’s address, message and link. Even if everyone who is following @ABalkhi was also following @ISAFmedia that’s still an additional 32K users exposed to the Taliban message for no reason.

— · Thu, Jun 21 2012 11:17:26
Essentially, @ISAFMedia is acting as a mouthpiece for imaginary Taliban, reaching a much wider audience than even the fake accounts are able to do on their own. 

That...is awesome. And I'm so stealing his jihadist Twitter bird. 

Tim Foxley from Afghan Hindsight had this to say with regard to the overall operational fallacy that underlies ISAF's Twitter "engagements": 

As is rightly pointed out by Sunny in Kabul, you can’t put across intelligently honed messages on the system and you are probably doing something wrong if that is what you are trying to do.  You can’t measure what effect you are having and you essentially surrender the initiative (and tie yourself down) to people who may or may not be main stream Taliban.

— · Thu, Jun 21 2012 10:36:24
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/some-thoughts-from-the-masses-on-paofailhttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/some-thoughts-from-the-masses-on-paofailThu, 21 Jun 2012 19:12:18 GMT<![CDATA[I...Am Super Smart]]>

Totally unrelated to Afghanistan...but yeah. I'm that good.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Thu, Jun 21 2012 05:20:15

This today:
C.I.A. Said to Aid in Steering Arms to Syrian RebelsC.I.A. Said to Aid in Steering Arms to Syrian Rebels
The weapons, including automatic rifles, rocket-propelled grenades, ammunition and some antitank weapons, are being funneled mostly acros...
I refer you to this series of tweets:
She's referring to this:
The Evidence of Jihadist Activity in Syria | Combating Terrorism Center at West PointThe Evidence of Jihadist Activity in Syria | Combating Terrorism Center at West Point
As the United Nations prepares to expand its observer mission in Syria and the world community debates what that mission should aim to ac...
I responded, but unfortunately did not save my comment. Your loss, folks -- terribly articulate. 
From the article: 

A small number of C.I.A. officers are operating secretly in southern Turkey, helping allies decide which Syrian opposition fighters across the border will receive arms to fight the Syrian government, according to American officials and Arab intelligence officers.

— · Thu, Jun 21 2012 04:50:56
And this...is disturbing. 

The weapons, including automatic rifles, rocket-propelled grenades, ammunition and some antitank weapons, are being funneled mostly across the Turkish border by way of a shadowy network of intermediaries including Syria’s Muslim Brotherhood and paid for by Turkey, Saudi Arabia and Qatar, the officials said.

— · Thu, Jun 21 2012 05:10:03
Granted, the jihadists discussed are not specifically mentioned, but the SMB is just one of the intermediaries here. 

At what point will US policy makers realize that anyone claiming any kind of connection to any thing that rhymes with Riyadh is probably, at some point in the future, no longer going to want to be friends? 

It's good to know that the CIA has learned, well, nothing from previous experiences enabling any kind of religiously-oriented militant/insurgent/whatever organization. 

At this point, I'd actually be happier with the drones. 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/i-am-super-smarthttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/i-am-super-smartThu, 21 Jun 2012 12:20:15 GMT<![CDATA[Social Media Situational Awareness: #PAOFail]]>

Yes, it's now a hashtag. Expect it often.

Storified by El Snarkistani · Tue, Jun 19 2012 05:41:49

So a few days ago this happened.
ISAF Gets in Twitter Fight with Imaginary Taliban. Again. ISAF Gets in Twitter Fight with Imaginary Taliban. Again.
All of this has happened before...
Then I came across this thanks to an astute blog reader. 
U.S. Twitter war vs. Taliban flares during weekend | HamptonRoads.com | PilotOnline.comU.S. Twitter war vs. Taliban flares during weekend | HamptonRoads.com | PilotOnline.com
The Twitter tiff: It's a realm usually reserved for celebrities like Lindsay Lohan and Kim Kardashian. On Sunday, though, Twitter yet aga...
Apparently Dan Lamothe (a generally solid reporter from what I've read of his work) also thinks this is an official Taliban feed. 

He tweeted the same story as it was picked up by Politico.

LTC Stewart Upton, referenced in the first story above, had this to say about the "engagement":

Upton, a Marine, said the Taliban post about “10 lies or false tweets a day” regarding operations under the jurisdiction of Regional Command Southwest. The Taliban’s goal, Upton told POLITICO in an email, is to project strength in the eyes of sympathizers and financial donors.

— · Tue, Jun 19 2012 01:38:27
Keep in mind that he's talking about the @ABalkhi (or @ABalkhii) account:

This is the most well-known of the alleged ‘Taliban’ accounts, yet everything seems to suggest that @Abalkhi (and the account later created, @Abalkhii with two ‘i’s) is unofficial. He never tweets any material which isn’t already up on the Taliban’s website. He seems to speak Pashtu and/or Dari (translating material from the news section of the Pashtu site before it has been translated and uploaded on the English site). This might be (at a stretch) one reason why journalists continue to refer to his account as being ‘official’. He also tweets completely manually — presumably because he has no access to the official site’s RSS stream (which is not provided to normal users of the website). He set up his account a week after the death of bin Laden, and my hunch is that the operator of this account probably doesn’t even live in Afghanistan (or Pakistan).

— · Tue, Jun 19 2012 01:49:52
So the account isn't a Taliban account, and I have my own personal reservations as to how much the 140 characters on Twitter are going to affect potential Taliban donors. 

Wouldn't it be easier to have a telethon? Or is that so last century? 

Upton goes on to explain why he was "engaging them". 

“By engaging them yesterday on their false claim, they were held to account for their post and forced to somehow try and validate it,” Upton said. “In the end, hopefully they lose credibility, donors, and recruits when these false posts are pointed out.”

— · Tue, Jun 19 2012 01:37:38
Huh. 

False posts get pointed out. 

Like these? 
If you're going to portray Twitter as some kind of outlet for information for which the tweeter should be held accountable for putting out inaccurate information, then @ISAFMedia failed miserably. 

The next tweet addressing this incident? This:
NATO apologizes for civilian deaths in Afghan airstrike by coalition | The Post and Courier | Charleston SC, News, Sports, EntertainmentNATO apologizes for civilian deaths in Afghan airstrike by coalition | The Post and Courier | Charleston SC, News, Sports, Entertainment
PATROL BASE PUL-I-ALAM, Afghanistan - The commander of US and NATO troops in Afghanistan apologized Friday for civilian deaths in a coali...
Which points to one of the key missteps that the PAO makes in using Twitter: it doesn't seem to fully grasp that Twitter is a tool for conversation, for getting information out, but not for condensing your press releases into 140 character segments. 

If you use one outlet to put out bad info (i.e., we didn't kill anyone), and you learn later that you're wrong (i.e., we killed a whole bunch of people), then address that. 

I'm going to assume that the "them" is the Taliban, even though...never mind. That horse is pretty dead by now. 

But back to his comment about donors. 

So I'm a wealthy businessman (let's say I live in...I dunno...Saudi Arabia). I have a lot of money I desperately want to give to support jihad in Afghanistan. 

I'm flipping through my timeline, just hoping Kim Kardashian responds to my pleas for a retweet, wondering what she sees in that Kanye anyway, and then I see that "engagement." 

I'd been thinking about funneling money through my financial networks, but then I run across that little gem, and suddenly, I think..."Wait. They're...liars! Thanks, USMC! I almost made a horrible investment mistake!" 

I'm sure that's just how that happens. 

Fortunately, LTC Upton has found more than one "Taliban" tweeter to take on, Devil Dog style: 
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/social-media-situational-awareness-paofailhttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/social-media-situational-awareness-paofailTue, 19 Jun 2012 12:41:49 GMT<![CDATA[ISAF Gets in Twitter Fight with Imaginary Taliban. Again. ]]>

All of this has happened before...

Storified by El Snarkistani · Sun, Jun 17 2012 07:02:12

I don't know why ISAF does this. 

Why their media team insists on "engaging" via Twitter with a supposed "Taliban" account that's likely some junior high kid somewhere besides Afghanistan. 

I've been somewhat critical of @ISAFMedia and their approach to Twitter in the past...but generally speaking it's more amusing than anything else: two non-combatants flailing away uselessly at each other in cyberspace, where @ISAFMedia is apparently trying to counter some kind of "Taliban messaging," when, in fact, the account (@ABalkhi) isn't actually a Taliban account at all, more than likely. 

I'll cite (again) this report on the issue:

@ABalkhi started: May 12, 2011 // regularity of tweets: Daily // language: English // name: Abdulqahar Balkhi following: 24 // followers: 4293 // number of tweets: 865 This is the most well-known of the alleged ‘Taliban’ accounts, yet everything seems to suggest that @Abalkhi (and the account later created, @Abalkhii with two ‘i’s) is unofficial. He never tweets any material which isn’t already up on the Taliban’s website. He seems to speak Pashtu and/or Dari (translating material from the news section of the Pashtu site before it has been translated and uploaded on the English site). This might be (at a stretch) one reason why journalists continue to refer to his account as being ‘official’. He also tweets completely manually — presumably because he has no access to the official site’s RSS stream (which is not provided to normal users of the website). He set up his account a week after the death of bin Laden, and my hunch is that the operator of this account probably doesn’t even live in Afghanistan (or Pakistan).

— · Fri, Jun 15 2012 18:07:34
Today's awesomeness starts here: 
Now, I'm not here as any kind of Taliban info apologist. While the tweeter isn't actually affiliated, the information they're tweeting definitely is. That much is not in dispute. 

What's also not in dispute is the fact that most of the Taliban info that comes from that website is way...way off. 
The Kabul security personnel statement? That's actually pretty accurate, according to the UNDP's latest Police Perception Survey.

From page 21 of the report, this:

Unlike other police misdeeds, an increase in drug abuse primarily is reported in Central Kabul, where 41 percent now say they’ve seen an ANP officer use drugs and 19 percent report police involvement in drug trafficking – up by 21 points and 9 points, respectively, in and around the capital area. 


So yeah...the cops be doing the drugs. In the Kabul. 


The silliness resumes. 

This next account is this guy (according to his Twitter bio):

Director Regional Command- South West Public Affairs, Afghanistan. 9/11 Pentagon survivor w/service in Haiti, Iraq, Japan & on DoD &HQ Marine Corps press desks.
So at least @ISAFMedia has friends in PAO land who understand Twitter engagements (and reality) just as well as they do. And that's just more awesome, really. 
Missy Ryan chimes in on this.
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]]>http://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/isaf-gets-in-twitter-fight-with-imaginary-talibanhttp://storify.com/ElSnarkistani/isaf-gets-in-twitter-fight-with-imaginary-talibanSun, 17 Jun 2012 14:02:12 GMT