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Fri, Aug 19 2011 22:09:53

Your awful dates, in 140 characters

I was walking through Clapham on Tuesday evening. A pub near the common reminded me of a bad date I went on. I tweeted about it. This is what ensued... Send your tweets to @firstdatehell

  1. rhodri
    rhodri@rhodri
    I've just walked past the Firefly, where I went on a date in 2002 that was so bad I heard myself say "So, what's Wigan like, then?"
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 13:24:40
  2. profanityswan
    profanityswan@profanityswan
    @rhodri I went on a bad date in 1999, where I heard myself say 'Yes, the internet - it's the future.'
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 13:28:27
  3. captainrobs
    captainrobs@captainrobs
    @rhodri Bad date in 2005: "so, how big is America then?" to an American.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 13:38:53
  4. StoriesForTots
    StoriesForTots@StoriesForTots
    @RhoDri A blind date so very bad, that I hid under the bed when he came around to my sister's house, the following day, looking for me.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 13:48:53
  5. raquelle
    raquelle@raquelle
    @rhodri On a soulmates date, date arrives and before sitting down announces 'I'm Jon. i don't want kids or commitment', then went for a piss
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 13:53:18
  6. theladymoo
    theladymoo@theladymoo
    @rhodri once on a date I refused a kiss goodnight so he asked if he could see my arse instead. I said no thanks.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:11:32
  7. existentialyes
    existentialyes@existentialyes
    @rhodri Whilst on a date with my friend, the guy had a phone call and said 'about 7' then pretended it was the ppl he'd interviewed that day
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:23:12
  8. NadiaKamil
    NadiaKamil@NadiaKamil
    @rhodri blind date I once went on turned out to be a weirdo who didn't order anything but watched me eat then paid for it.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:23:59
  9. KSmyth2010
    KSmyth2010@KSmyth2010
    @rhodri went speed dating once. Met bloke with odd tattoo. He took shirt off to show me a trail of tattoo mice - one for each year of life
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:46:35
  10. laurenros
    laurenros@laurenros
    @rhodri I went on a blind date with someone who wore striped hotpants, took Adios and had Queer Eye for the Straight Guy in his DVD player.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:46:47
  11. natlondon
    natlondon@natlondon
    @rhodri Went on a date with a guy who LOVED his local Wetherspoons, said 'some people he knew' even took Mondays off to spend there.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:51:21
  12. cazzahickey
    cazzahickey@cazzahickey
    @rhodri Amen 2 that. On my last date the guy had a pet WOODEN giraffe who had his own Fbook page. His name was Sebastian. (The giraffe).
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 14:53:59
  13. marzillk
    marzillk@marzillk
    Though a date did once turn up in a kit car he'd built himself and talked about car maintenance all evening. His name was Sheldon. @rhodri
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:00:46
  14. D_for_Dalrymple
    D_for_Dalrymple@D_for_Dalrymple
    @rhodri I've dated TWO toryboys who pretended to be liberals to impress me. The one in the three-piece tweed suit managed to hold out 3 wks.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:01:15
  15. rhodri
    rhodri@rhodri
    It's getting serious RT @cazzahickey: Then there was the speed-dater who spent his allotted 3 mins talking to me via his imaginary friend...
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:06:27
  16. dobster1878
    dobster1878@dobster1878
    @rhodri another doubled up on every drink he bought himself. I was on soft drinks. He attempted a "move" and fell over.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:07:33
  17. dobster1878
    dobster1878@dobster1878
    @rhodri another sat down and told me he really only dated black woman. It wasn't a blind date either.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:08:24
  18. The_Moviegoer
    The_Moviegoer@The_Moviegoer
    @rhodri Guy came to get me in his new Porsche. Before I got in, he put a towel on my seat because "girls can sometimes be sweaty down there"
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:09:59
  19. KateSawyer
    KateSawyer@KateSawyer
    @rhodri I went on an internet date where 15 minutes in the guy said "If I was my friend Michael I'd do *this*" and promptly grabbed my tits.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:10:41
  20. abzbyrne
    abzbyrne@abzbyrne
    @rhodri I had one who turned up, on a warm summer evening, in a huge arran jumper because he thought I'd like that being Irish.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:10:55
  21. Aichas
    Aichas@Aichas
    Date story 2 @rhodri I was once asked if I would, i quote "rub my bottom like mummy used to"
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:13:16
  22. RoxanneLaWin
    RoxanneLaWin@RoxanneLaWin
    @rhodri One gentleman took me to the pub car park to show me his motorbike. He revved it for about ten minutes then did a lap and drove off
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:14:53
  23. annaleeb
    annaleeb@annaleeb
    @rhodri A speed dater asked if I was ok about him turning up when he wanted but not contacting me btween visits. Also insisted I learn piano
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:15:11
  24. rhodri
    rhodri@rhodri
    Showoff. RT @jiggott: @rhodri I took a blind date bowling and couldn't stop scoring strikes. She thought I was showing off. So embarrassed.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:21:21
  25. Eamonn_Forde
    Eamonn_Forde@Eamonn_Forde
    @rhodri I went out with someone very briefly who stubbed a cigarette out on the back of my hand. After asking to. And me saying no.
    Tue, Aug 16 2011 15:17:06

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Rhodri Marsden

Writer, mainly for The Independent. Scritti Politti muso. Hate curling up on a sofa with a DVD. Enjoy producing insulin using my pancreas. Views are my dad's.

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