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Tue, Mar 27 2012 14:05:10

Glen Weldon Recreates 'The Hunger Games' At Work

  1. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Day 2. Killed Fax and Polycom, the two tributes from HR. Sliced their throats w/a yogurt lid from the 3rd floor fridge.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 06:38:59
  2. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Day 2: Have constructed crude Punji sticks out of filing cabinet dividers I've smeared with human filth. Now...to wait.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 06:45:11
  3. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Day 2. Found poor Webex's body poleaxed to the copy machine. Liase! Backstop! I know you did this! I'm coming for you!
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 06:51:37
  4. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Day 2. Ambushed by Eval, the HR tribute. Gutted him w/shards of coffee pot he always finishes but NEVER GODDAMN REFILLS.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 07:00:14
  5. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Day 2: It's gonna come down to me & SWOT, the tribute from Programs. She's got the strategy. But I've got binder clips.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 07:07:52
  6. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Two cannon shots; I bathe in the blood of Backstop and Liase. Glitch from IT blanches, runs for the elevator. Wise man.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 07:33:23
  7. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: SWOT is down! FAQ and Flack from Communications got to her first. Smothered her w/press clippings. Sadistic bastards.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 07:42:59
  8. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Schmooze (male tribute from Development) calls a temporary truce. It's his birthday; there's sheetcake in the boardroom.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 07:54:24
  9. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: THE SHEETCAKE IS POISONED. Ledger & Budget lie dead on the floor. Blog is coughing up blood. Good thing I hate coconut.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 08:00:55
  10. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Back in my District, they're calling me "The Man Who Was On Probation Because Of That Thing At The Annual Meeting."
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 08:14:12
  11. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: The two tributes from Mailroom (Surly and Sullen) have the tapeguns. Gotta take them out or I'll end up like Outreach...
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 08:28:45
  12. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Feedback & Buy-In (from Education) are hunting in a pack w/ Schmooze & Booze, the twin tributes from Development. Crap.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 08:49:12
  13. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Ground glass into chix salad sandwich; put in fridge marked GLEN'S LUNCH DO NOT EAT. Now we watch. And we wait.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 09:29:45
  14. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: The Education/Development alliance got Hold & Voicemail from Customer Service. The air smells of burnt flesh and toner.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 10:10:46
  15. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Surly, the male tribute from Mailroom, is down, taken out by the sandwich. The female, Sullen, stands over him. Wailing.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 10:27:06
  16. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: 7 tributes left: wan, moony Glitch from IT; grim Sullen from Mailroom; the maniacal Education/Development alliance; me.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 10:33:49
  17. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Schmooze & Buy-In fell into my pit of filing-cabinet-divider Punji sticks. Screams. Silence. Birdsong. 2 cannon shots.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 10:44:21
  18. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Poor Sullen. She's taken to wearing her fallen comrade's face; sings sad songs about postage, softly, in his voice.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 11:09:05
  19. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Heads of Communications tributes FAQ & Flack on pikes by 3rd flr bathroom. Glitch's handiwork. "Soon,"I whisper. "Soon."
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 11:24:09
  20. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Found what's left of Feedback & Booze. It was Glitch, again; he used a staple remover. I will kill him last, & slowest.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 11:35:55
  21. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Sullen, in her grief, is absently microwaving popcorn. Mad, foolish girl! Glitch will smell it! He will find you!
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 11:47:29
  22. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: A cannon shot. From my hidey-hole inside the shredder I see Glitch run from the kitchen, face covered blood. SULLEN!!!
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 12:02:28
  23. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: I race to my office & send a help desk request. Glitch will come; he must - it is a matter of honor. I will be waiting.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 12:14:28
  24. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Odd. He has not come. Hasn't even sent back a snide email asking if I've tried rebooting. Something is very wrong here.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 12:20:05
  25. ghweldon
    Glen Weldon@ghweldon
    Dayjob Hunger Game: Was SURE I knew his weakness. What'm I missing? Peek out of my office. Words "MAILROOM. NOW." scrawled on wall in blood.
    Tue, Mar 27 2012 12:29:38

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Monkey See is NPR's entertainment and pop-culture blog.

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