by
Fri, Apr 13 2012 18:03:32

All The President's Presidents

Get to know America's presidents, the Disalmanac way.

  1. Batemanimation
    ·
    Wed, Apr 11 2012 14:08:19
  2. 1. George Washington (1789-1797)
  3. Presidents: George Washington
    From 1776 through 1788, America had no leader. This meant that there was nobody to make phone calls to sports teams that had just won cha...
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  4. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1789, George Washington was unanimously chosen to be our first president, and our first Miss America.
    Sat, Feb 04 2012 13:01:38
  5. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1792, George Washington cast the first veto, rejecting Congress' George Washington Is A Wooden-Toothed Poopyhead Act.
    Thu, Apr 05 2012 12:02:20
  6. 2. John Adams (1797-1801)
  7. Presidents: John Adams
    When George Washington abruptly announced he wouldn't seek a third term in 1796, America was heartbroken. John Adams was a "rebound" pres...
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  8. Disalmanac Podcast 026: John Adams (with Eli Braden)
    This week: fact-like facts about John Adams. He was president a long, long time ago. Also, he was Paul Revere's wing man, so Paul could g...
    Wordpress
  9. 3. Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)
  10. Presidents: Thomas Jefferson
    Thomas Jefferson not only wrote the Declaration of Independence, but also the wildly popular self-help books, "Do Not Perspire Upon Items...
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  11. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1743, Thomas Jefferson was born. He wrote the Declaration of Independence, which had the working title "God Emperor of Dune."
    Fri, Apr 13 2012 13:01:12
  12. Disalmanac Podcast 021: Thomas Jefferson (with Bill Corbett)
    This week: learn all sorts of fact-like facts about Thomas Jefferson. For instance: he was a biped. Named Thomas. That's two fact-like fa...
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  13. 4. James Madison (1809-1817)
  14. James Madison: Hold Me Closer, Tiny President
    James Madison was our shortest president, at just under four inches in height. His wife, Smurfette, was one of out most beloved First Lad...
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  15. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1751, James Madison was born. He's known as "The Father of the Constitution," but he loves it when you call him Big Poppa.
    Wed, Mar 16 2011 13:31:27
  16. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1814, the British set fire to the White House because they heard that President James Madison was born in Kenya or some shit.
    Wed, Aug 24 2011 14:01:44
  17. 5. James Monroe (1817-1825)
  18. James Monroe: Another Guy Who Was President
    James Monroe is best known for the Monroe Doctrine. But he was also responsible for the Monroe Guideline, the Monroe Friendly Advice, and...
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  19. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1758, James Monroe was born. He was known for the Monroe Doctrine, which states: "Donald Trump is a fucking assferret."
    Thu, Apr 28 2011 10:01:10
  20. 6. John Quincy Adams (1825-1829)
  21. John Quincy Adams, a.k.a "Junior"
    John Quincy Adams was the son of second president John Adams. When the senior Adams wouldn't let him borrow the horse-and-buggy for his i...
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  22. 7. Andrew Jackson (1829-1837)
  23. Andrew Jackson: Not Properly House-Trained
    Andrew Jackson was nicknamed "Old Hickory" because most of his head was whittled out of a single block of oak. He lost his original head ...
    Wordpress
  24. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1767, Andrew Jackson was born. He was called "Ol' Hickory" because he had to have a wooden head after a tobacco chewin' accident.
    Thu, Mar 15 2012 13:31:11
  25. Disalmanac
    Disalmanac@Disalmanac
    Today in 1833, Andrew Jackson became the first president to ride a train, because all the previous presidents were total pussies.
    Mon, Jun 06 2011 12:01:17

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One of Paste Magazine's Top 100 Twitter Feeds of 2011. Contact: [email protected] (no submissions). Disalmanac is @batemanimation.

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